I decided that I would not write a traditional Thanksgiving column last week. So I didn’t.

It’s not that I’m not grateful, I am very grateful — for food on the table, for our hard-won freedoms, and for everything in between.

However, on the phone on Thanksgiving morning, I found myself grousing to a friend about all the petty things that were wrong on that particular gorgeous Colorado day.

My tone of voice and my whining irritated even me.

It took me most of the rest of the day to figure out that when I am able to let go of these gripes, I also make room for gratitude I didn’t know I was missing.

Now I’m writing that what-I-am-thankful-for column here:

Gripe: My check-engine light is on … again. (It’s not the gas cap.)

Gratitude: After driving a gutless wonder for about a year, I’m thrilled with my new-to-me pre-owned car.

It’s in good shape and was well maintained by the previous owner. The engine light is probably just an electrical thing. It’s happened before and the light went off all by itself.

Gripe: I have to shorten my upcoming vacation, my first in more than two years. I just landed a new contract job that started quickly last week after I interviewed the week before.

Gratitude: I just landed a new contract job that started quickly last week after I interviewed the week before.

Gratitude (times 2): I am taking a vacation, my first in more than two years.

Gripe: When I do have to go in to the office, the commute is horrendous, especially for someone who hates to drive. It takes 45 minutes in the morning and 70 minutes to get home in the evening. This could make me crazy, especially when the snow begins to fly.

Gratitude: I can use this commute time to learn a new language, or — given the amount of time I could be on the road — several languages!

Gripe: I kicked the leg of a metal chair that was a few inches out of place and injured my foot, again.

Gratitude: Hmmm ... this one is a little harder. What have I got to be grateful about when I’ve re-injured the toes that have kept me off my bike since June?

Aha! The weather is still gorgeous in Colorado — guess I will wear flip-flops a little while longer.

Gripe: I ran out of sweet potatoes while I was making a dish to take to a Thanksgiving meal and I had to go to the grocery store, again.

Gratitude: People were working on Thanksgiving Day to make sure that people like me — who misjudge the amount of sweet potatoes for 17 people — would be able to get what I needed on the morning of the actual holiday.

See? It works. And I found that pushing away pain helps too. Thanksgiving was always such a family-oriented holiday as I was growing up; I miss my mom and dad. And, my beloved nephew is away in Japan this year, teaching English to kids who adore him.

I was a bit sad and lonely on Thanksgiving morning.

Gratitude: My sister, her husband, and his family always include me, and I took my sweet potatoes later to their Thanksgiving celebration.

I am grateful to be a part of this wonderful family and its four generations. My beloved niece was also there, and we all shared a holiday message from my nephew.

I hope that you too enjoyed a happy Thanksgiving, and that you will find some time soon to reflect on your own gripes.

I bet you’ll be grateful you did.

Andrea Doray is a full-time writer who happily accepts Thanksgiving leftovers. Contact her at a.doray@andreadoray.com, especially if you have gravy.